It must have been somewhere around 1pm when we arrived at the Bristol and it wasn’t long afterwards that we all went our separate ways – by which I mean everyone went to the poolside except me who (once again) hit the road on what I knew was to be one of my last walkabouts. As I took off up Main Street on my way to Europa Point I knew within minutes I was in for quite an emotional afternoon, just as I know that these final few posts of my memoirs will probably be the hardest of all for me to write.

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Passing through Convent Place I glanced over at the side door of the Angry Friar which very nearly became my own front door back in 1976; although it’s just a door, a piece of wood, it’s a door with a place in my personal history (see 2:8) and so to glance over at it as I pass by seems such a natural thing for me to do. 

Recently I listened to a Radio 4 programme in which a researcher was presenting his findings to prove that trees have emotions, make friends and communicate with other trees. As I glanced at the door there was no doubt I was communicating with it though I wasn’t sure if I was saying hi or goodbye but surreally I did wonder if it knew – and whether it was communicating back.

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(Left: 1976 with the children. Right: 2016 in the same place outside John Mac Hall, Gibraltar)

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Continuing on further up Main Street I paused by the road crossing to reflect awhile and take a photo to compliment one taken of me in the exact same spot forty years previously almost to the day. 

In the first photo I’m holding my new born daughter SAM and my eldest daughter Tracey is standing in the foreground. Although I don’t remember where we were going that day I like to think we were off to Alameda Gardens play park where we spent many hours when I wasn’t working; or perhaps we were on our way to the Piazza (which in those days was the hub of everyone’s social life) where we often spent Saturday mornings having drinks and snacks.

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When I compared the first photo with the second (taken in May 2016) I suddenly (sadly) felt a massive loss; although I’m extremely close to all of my children today I feel grief at my days of being a young parent having gone knowing I can never get them back. And because those (halcyon) days were spent in Gibraltar is (just another reason) why the Rock is so important to me personally and why my connection with it is so strong. Wherever I go in Gibraltar I’m a young parent again. 

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Perhaps there are people who may never understand that concept and that’s ok; but I’m so very blessed that my children do.

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